Once you have made the decision to end your marriage, there is no point in delaying or dragging out the proceedings. Divorce is rarely easy but the legal process itself does not need to take countless months as you and your spouse place your lives on hold. In many cases, you may be able obtain a finalized divorce judgment in a little as just a few weeks, but doing so requires a bit of effort on your part and cooperation from your spouse.

#1: Develop a Plan of Attack

The easiest way to eliminate delays in divorce is to negotiate as much of your settlement as you possibly can. You and your spouse may not agree on everything, so start with the simplest topics. For example, if you have little concern about certain pieces of property, agree on those and then build on the cooperative momentum. Eventually, you will get to more difficult subjects, but, by that point, you will have likely established a level of commitment to completing the process amicably.

#2: Choose Your Battles

If you and your spouse cannot reach an agreement before filing for divorce, you can still help move the proceedings along by controlling yourself and your need to “win” on all fronts. By picking a fight—or engaging when your spouse picks one—on every concern, you will never make real progress toward a resolution. Decide what is truly important to—your children, for example—and focus your energy on that particular area while letting less significant things go.

When you are responsible for making child support payments, virtually every financial decision you make can affect your ability to meet your obligations. This is especially true if you are considering a job or a career change, as your income is very likely to change. While an increase in your income can be a good thing, a decrease could make it impossible for you to comply with your child support requirements. You may be able to petition the court for an order modification, but depending upon the circumstances of your employment, your request could be denied.

Illinois Law

According to the Illinois Marriage and Dissolution of Marriage Act, an order for child support may be amended upon a showing of a substantial change in circumstances. Losing a job, starting a new one, a significant promotion or demotion, and a complete career change could all create a significant difference in your monthly and annual income. The law recognizes a change in employment status as one of the possible causes for a substantial change in circumstances for the purposes of pursuing an order modification.

Good Faith

Everyone has made choices in their lives that have had a negative outcome, despite being made for the right reasons. Your intentions are an extremely important consideration when seeking a child support order modification, particularly if your income has decreased. If you simply walked away from a steady job with no current, realistic prospects, you are not likely to be granted relief. Similarly, if you were dismissed from your job for inappropriate or destructive behavior, or lack of production due to your own fault, your support obligation will probably not be reduced.

Legendary musician and songwriter Slash can finally enjoy some closure after a long divorce process. Unfortunately, it is at the cost of over $6 million. The rock star agreed to pay his former wife Perla Ferrar a $6,627,352 equalization payment. Additionally, he will pay $100,000 in spousal support and $39,000 in child support each month. The artist, whose real name is Saul Hudson, will also help support his children by contributing 1.8 percent of his income to the 16- and 14-year-olds. Hudson will keep ownership of his $1.92 million guitar collection.

A Long Journey to End a 13-Year Marriage

The decision for Hudson and Ferrar to split was not a recent one. The couple struggled with marital conflict for years. In 2010, Hudson filed for divorce and intended to leave Ferrar. The couple was able to reach a reconciliation two months later. Four years later in 2014, he filed for divorce again. This separation did end up being permanent. Hudson rekindled a relationship with an ex-girlfriend and moved in with her, signaling that the marriage was beyond reconciliation this time. However, it would be another four years until the marriage legally ended.

Accusations of Bigamy

Hudson accused Ferrar of bigamy because of issues related to her 1993 marriage to Carlos Marty. The rocker alleges that improper filing of divorce documents meant that Ferrar was still married when she married him. Hudson hoped that the error would mean that Ferrar did not have any legal right to his extravagant wealth and assets. However, because of complicated laws regarding putative marriages, or marriages considered legally invalid only due to a technical impediment, Ferrar was still awarded the multi-million dollar divorce settlement.

If you are a parent who has decided to get a divorce, you may have spent countless hours worrying about how to tell the children about the split. There are many things to keep in mind when choosing how and when to tell your children about the end of your marriage. Every parent facing this difficult conversation hopes that it will go as smoothly as possible. Understandably, many children are upset when they hear about the forthcoming separation, but research shows that there are several steps parents can take to minimize the distraught caused by breaking the news of divorce to their kids.

Do Not Tell Children About the Divorce Until You Are Totally Certain

If you and your spouse have discussed the possibility of separating, but there is still a chance that you will stay together, you should wait to discuss this with children. For example, if a couple is experiencing extreme conflict or disconnectedness, but they both believe that there is still a possibility of saving the marriage, they should not bring the children into the situation. If you and your spouse both agree that you are beyond the point of reconciliation, you may be ready to tell your children about the separation.

Break the News With Your Spouse

One way parents can help comfort children and reduce the trauma caused by the news of divorce is by delivering the news as a team. If possible, most experts suggest that parents should be together when they tell the children about their plans to separate. Sitting with your soon-to-be-ex-spouse while explaining the situation to the children helps assure the children that although their parents are divorcing each other, the parent-child relationship remains intact.

The Millennial generation certainly has its own ideas about marriage, and, in many ways, they are not like those of their parents. An interesting shift is taking place in the way younger people perceive marriage and its importance. Throughout the last 60 years, several trends have arisen. People, in general, are waiting longer to get married, divorce is more common, and couples are having fewer children. During the 1950s, 75 percent of women in their early 20s were married whereas only 50 percent are now.

Repeating History

It is true that young people are waiting longer to get married and having fewer children, however, the trend we are experiencing today with is not unlike the time before the post-war baby boom. The average age at which couples get married today is only slightly higher than the average age of those in the late 19th and early 20th centuries.

What has changed since the 50s? Over the last several decades, there has been a dramatic shift in many aspects of American society. Women are more invested in their careers, there is less pressure to have a traditional family, and debt from student loans are all factors that contribute to the postponement of marriage. Furthermore, it is more socially acceptable to have children before getting married than it was during the much more conservative 1950s.