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How to Create a Successful Parenting Plan During Your Divorce
Getting a divorce is likely to be a stressful time in your life. As you go about the process of separating from your spouse, you will need to divide a variety of things, including both the property you own and the time you spend with your children. While your marital property will be divided based on what is fair and equitable, decisions about children are based on what is in their best interests, and the final decisions are set down in a document called a parenting plan.
What Is a Parenting Plan?
In Illinois, the laws regarding child custody contain some terms that may be unfamiliar to parents. In 2016, the terms “custody” and “visitation” were removed from Illinois family laws and replaced by “parental responsibility” and “parenting time.” A parenting plan created during divorce will address these issues, providing a framework for how matters related to children will be handled going forward. A parenting plan should include a variety of elements, including how parents will divide or share decision-making responsibilities for children, a specific schedule of when children will spend time with each parent, and rules for how parents will communicate with each other. If parents cannot agree with each other about the terms of their parenting plan, then the judge will make a decision based on what is in the best interests of the child.
What Are the Most Common Reasons for Divorce?
Marriage is a bond that unites two people. However, even though a couple’s marriage vows say that they will stay together “in sickness and in health,” sometimes a marriage does not last, and divorce becomes necessary. Some cultures and religions look down on getting a divorce, and parents may think that it is better to say married for their children, but a divorce is often the best decision for the two parties, and living in an unhappy home can cause more harm to children than separated parents.
During the colonial days of the United States, one of the earliest examples of divorce could be seen in Massachusetts. In 1629, a judicial council was developed there to grant divorces on the grounds of instances such as of bigamy, adultery, or desertion. Today, an affair is still a common reason for a couple to get a divorce, but there are a wide variety of other circumstances in which a couple may decide to separate, including:
Dividing Retirement Investments in Divorce
You have worked very hard for many years to accumulate significant assets which you assumed would fund your retirement. Whether you have a fully-vested pension plan, 401(k), IRA, or other investments accounts, those funds will likely be waiting for you when you retire—unless you get divorced. Retirement investments, like any other asset, may be considered marital property and, therefore, would be subject to division between you and your spouse in the event of divorce. There are several ways in which retirement accounts may be considered in divorce, including one that may require the use of a Qualified Domestic Relations Order, or QDRO.
Dividing or Offsetting
Depending upon when you first began contributing to your retirement funds, all of your investments may not be subject to division. According to the Illinois Marriage and Dissolution of Marriage Act, only the portion that accumulated during your marriage is considered marital property. You might need the help of a financial professional to establish the value of the investment prior to the marriage, so that only the correct portion is considered during the divorce process. Once that has been done, you, your spouse, and the court need to determine how, or even if, the investments will be divided.
The Basics of Appealing Your Divorce Judgment
In most cases involving divorce or family law matters, the parties are able to negotiate an agreement outside of the courtroom. They only require the court to approve and formalize terms already drafted, with very little actual decision-making required. Sometimes, though, the parties cannot reach an agreement and the matter is left to the court to decide. Such a ruling by the court typically carries an air of finality, especially if it feels like you were on the “losing” end. A less than favorable judgment is not necessarily the end, however, and filing an appeal could potentially allow you to work toward setting things right.
You Must Act Quickly
Following the entry of the initial court’s judgment, you have 30 days to file a Notice of Appeal. The notice must be filed with the circuit court and announces your intention to challenge all or part of the judgment and the relief that you intend to seek. The reviewing or appellate court may grant an extension for up to an additional 30 days, but only if you have a justified reason for missing the original deadline.
What You Should Know About Moving Out of the Area With Your Child
Today’s world is, in many ways, more connected than ever before. Thanks to the rise of digital and online technology, it has never been easier to look for new employment or educational opportunities that may exist far from your current home. For some people, it is also relatively easy to pick up and move to a new city or state in search of a better life, but this is not the case for everyone. If you are divorced, separated, or unmarried and you and your child’s other parent share parental responsibilities, moving to a new area can be rather complicated.
How Far Is Too Far?
The Illinois Marriage and Dissolution of Marriage Act provides that any move that qualifies as a “relocation” must be approved by the court in advance. A relocation is any move by a parent with half or more of the parenting time with the child that exceeds a certain radius from the current home. If you currently live in Kane County—or Cook, DuPage, Lake, McHenry, or Will County—an in-state move of more than 25 miles is a relocation. If you currently live in any other county, a relocation is any in-state move of over 50 miles. Finally, if you live anywhere in Illinois and move more than 25 miles to a new out-of-state home, the move is considered a relocation.
Four Ways to Make Your Divorce Faster and Easier
Once you have made the decision to end your marriage, there is no point in delaying or dragging out the proceedings. Divorce is rarely easy but the legal process itself does not need to take countless months as you and your spouse place your lives on hold. In many cases, you may be able obtain a finalized divorce judgment in a little as just a few weeks, but doing so requires a bit of effort on your part and cooperation from your spouse.
#1: Develop a Plan of Attack
The easiest way to eliminate delays in divorce is to negotiate as much of your settlement as you possibly can. You and your spouse may not agree on everything, so start with the simplest topics. For example, if you have little concern about certain pieces of property, agree on those and then build on the cooperative momentum. Eventually, you will get to more difficult subjects, but, by that point, you will have likely established a level of commitment to completing the process amicably.
Child Support Modifications and Good Faith
When you are responsible for making child support payments, virtually every financial decision you make can affect your ability to meet your obligations. This is especially true if you are considering a job or a career change, as your income is very likely to change. While an increase in your income can be a good thing, a decrease could make it impossible for you to comply with your child support requirements. You may be able to petition the court for an order modification, but depending upon the circumstances of your employment, your request could be denied.
Illinois Law
According to the Illinois Marriage and Dissolution of Marriage Act, an order for child support may be amended upon a showing of a substantial change in circumstances. Losing a job, starting a new one, a significant promotion or demotion, and a complete career change could all create a significant difference in your monthly and annual income. The law recognizes a change in employment status as one of the possible causes for a substantial change in circumstances for the purposes of pursuing an order modification.
Guns N’ Roses Rocker Agrees to $6.6 Million Divorce Settlement
Legendary musician and songwriter Slash can finally enjoy some closure after a long divorce process. Unfortunately, it is at the cost of over $6 million. The rock star agreed to pay his former wife Perla Ferrar a $6,627,352 equalization payment. Additionally, he will pay $100,000 in spousal support and $39,000 in child support each month. The artist, whose real name is Saul Hudson, will also help support his children by contributing 1.8 percent of his income to the 16- and 14-year-olds. Hudson will keep ownership of his $1.92 million guitar collection.
A Long Journey to End a 13-Year Marriage
The decision for Hudson and Ferrar to split was not a recent one. The couple struggled with marital conflict for years. In 2010, Hudson filed for divorce and intended to leave Ferrar. The couple was able to reach a reconciliation two months later. Four years later in 2014, he filed for divorce again. This separation did end up being permanent. Hudson rekindled a relationship with an ex-girlfriend and moved in with her, signaling that the marriage was beyond reconciliation this time. However, it would be another four years until the marriage legally ended.
Try These Tips When Telling Your Children About Your Impending Divorce
If you are a parent who has decided to get a divorce, you may have spent countless hours worrying about how to tell the children about the split. There are many things to keep in mind when choosing how and when to tell your children about the end of your marriage. Every parent facing this difficult conversation hopes that it will go as smoothly as possible. Understandably, many children are upset when they hear about the forthcoming separation, but research shows that there are several steps parents can take to minimize the distraught caused by breaking the news of divorce to their kids.
Do Not Tell Children About the Divorce Until You Are Totally Certain
If you and your spouse have discussed the possibility of separating, but there is still a chance that you will stay together, you should wait to discuss this with children. For example, if a couple is experiencing extreme conflict or disconnectedness, but they both believe that there is still a possibility of saving the marriage, they should not bring the children into the situation. If you and your spouse both agree that you are beyond the point of reconciliation, you may be ready to tell your children about the separation.
Millennials Are Waiting to Get Married
The Millennial generation certainly has its own ideas about marriage, and, in many ways, they are not like those of their parents. An interesting shift is taking place in the way younger people perceive marriage and its importance. Throughout the last 60 years, several trends have arisen. People, in general, are waiting longer to get married, divorce is more common, and couples are having fewer children. During the 1950s, 75 percent of women in their early 20s were married whereas only 50 percent are now.
Repeating History
It is true that young people are waiting longer to get married and having fewer children, however, the trend we are experiencing today with is not unlike the time before the post-war baby boom. The average age at which couples get married today is only slightly higher than the average age of those in the late 19th and early 20th centuries.
What has changed since the 50s? Over the last several decades, there has been a dramatic shift in many aspects of American society. Women are more invested in their careers, there is less pressure to have a traditional family, and debt from student loans are all factors that contribute to the postponement of marriage. Furthermore, it is more socially acceptable to have children before getting married than it was during the much more conservative 1950s.
